


I Inflict Pain

by MoonSecrets



Category: The Witcher (TV), Wiedźmin | The Witcher - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/F, F/M, Hurt, One-Sided Attraction, Unrequited Love, set in episode 5, this hurt me to write i'm sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-31
Updated: 2020-01-31
Packaged: 2021-02-25 08:21:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22492984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonSecrets/pseuds/MoonSecrets
Summary: Slowly, Yennefer pushed back her chair and walked over to Tissaia, sitting down next to her on the bed, their legs nearly touching. Tissaia opened her eyes when she felt the bed dip beside her.“Tell me what’s been going on with you?” Yennefer asked nicely, showing Tissaia that she was at least a bit sorry and wanted to try and make it up to her.
Relationships: Geralt z Rivii | Geralt of Rivia/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg, Tissaia de Vries/Yennefer z Vengerbergu | Yennefer of Vengerberg
Comments: 13
Kudos: 117





	I Inflict Pain

**Author's Note:**

> Set in Episode 1x05. Starts off the same as their scene in the episode and then diverts. I love them but you know they'd have loads of angst and hurt. Enjoy the pain!

“You like pain. We get it,” Tissaia started, she stood behind Yennefer as she watched the younger mage delicately apply her lipstick. Watching as Yennefer slowly, seductively, painted her lips a bright red that made Tissaia’s breath catch in her throat. She just managed to look up again before Yennefer noticed her staring in the mirror.

“I inflict pain,” Yennefer stated in a bored yet haughty manner. 

“My dear, you still think there’s a difference,” Tissaia smirked, trying not to sound too condescending. She gave Yennefer a strained, yet still proper, smile. “It’s been too long,” she sounded fairly neutral, only allowing a speck of disappointment in her voice. Tissaia forced herself to take a deep breath. “I haven’t seen you for years. Not since you maneuvered your way onto Aedirn’s court.”

Yennefer made a soft noise in her throat, one that had it been in a different circumstance Tissaia would have appreciated but not today. No, today she was there to warn Yennefer.

“I heard that went well,” Tissaia said.

“King Virfuril is fine, I’m sure,” Yennefer stated, sounding incredibly bored which frustrated Tissaia to no end. This girl was playing so dangerously with the fire of Court and the Brotherhood, how did she not see that?

“He’s dead now. King Demavend reigns now,” Tissaia paused, letting that knowledge sink in. “Down south, Fringilla’s thrived in the post that should’ve been yours,” Tissaia was pleased to see that Yennefer at least had the decency to look down, not in shame but something at least, at those words. “The rightful heir returned to Nilfgaard and she’s helped him restore peace.”

At this Yennefer snapped, unable to keep quiet as her former rectoress seemed to be raking her over the coals.

“Why are you here?” the raven haired sorceress finally turned to look at Tissaia. Tissaia pursed her lips together and turned away, needing a moment to decide on the best way to speak to Yennefer about this. 

“You remained hidden for a while,” Tissaia walked over to the canopy bed in Yennefer’s room, taking a bored glance behind the curtains before sitting down at the edge of the bed, crossing one leg over the other. “But now, you’re making noise,” the rectoress took a small pause before changing her tone, speaking more softly and caringly. “You’re looking for something. You’re wasting your time. The so-called mages you’re enlisting will not help you with your problem. And if you’re not careful, you will become just like them … irrelevant.”

Tissaia knew that Yennefer was listening, despite the young mage’s best efforts to seem uninterested. It was all a show. Tissaia could not fathom why Yennefer, after all this time, still attempted to have a different persona about her when they met. Sometimes Yennefer would slip up and Tissaia dreamed of those moments. Moments where she got to see the real Yennefer, the Yennefer she loved and adored.

“You are pure chaos right now. You want a cure, and it’s making you sloppy,” Tissaia knew that Yennefer would hate being called sloppy. But Yennefer continued to pretend to try out different earrings, forcing Tissaia to continue talking until Yennefer would finally speak. “The Brotherhood left you to your own devices once you abandoned Aedirn. But this behaviour, flaunted in direct conflict with her agenda, will not be tolerated. They will come after you,” she warned.

“That’s why you’re here. To warn me, How can I ever repay you?” Yennefer said sarcastically, rolling her eyes as she spoke.

Tissaia never understood how the one she cared for so deeply could also infuriate her the most out of anyone she had ever met. Why did Yennefer continue to fight against her after all these years?

“Don’t be petty. This is on you. You knew the cost of enchantment.”

“But I didn’t know what it would mean to me,” Yennefer spoke for the first time with emotion in her voice which Tissaia was pleased to hear but still could not understand.

“What does it mean to you? Why?” she did her best to see Yennefer in the mirror, hoping to find something on her face that explained this obsession that her piglet had. “Why do you want a baby?” she held her hands together very tightly, to keep them from hitting the bedpost in frustration.

“The continent is vast. Just because you don’t know of a cure doesn’t mean there isn’t one. It’s simply beyond your scope,” Yennefer said, purposefully to hurt the rectoress, to make her feel inadequate and less intelligent. It should have angered Tissaia but all she felt was sadness for the sorceress.

“Please Yennefer, just stop,” Tissaia sighed and closed her eyes, pinching the bridge of her nose to try and stop the coming headache. “How did we get like this?” Yennefer thought the rectoress sounded almost mournful at those words, causing her to stay silent for a minute. 

Slowly, Yennefer pushed back her chair and walked over to Tissaia, sitting down next to her on the bed, their legs nearly touching. Tissaia opened her eyes when she felt the bed dip beside her.

“Tell me what’s been going on with you?” Yennefer asked nicely, showing Tissaia that she was at least a bit sorry and wanted to try and make it up to her.

Tissaia thought she would cry. Yennefer had never, not once, asked about her. It had always been Tissaia helping her and making sure that Yennefer had someone to talk to. This reciprocation was so unexpected that Tissaia temporarily forgot how to speak. She could not even think of anything of interest that _had_ happened, let alone know how to form words again. 

“We just had several mages ascend. One could give you a run for your coin actually. She has quite the aptitude for magick, much like you. Nearly just as stubborn too,” Tissaia smirked at that and could feel jealous energy emanating off of Yennefer. 

“You’re lying, no one compares to me,” Yennefer said with an air of arrogance and a joking smile on her face. Although Tissaia knew it to be true, no one could ever compare to Yennefer. Tissaia managed to laugh at Yennefer’s words, trying to seem not affected by how true those words were to her.

Peaceful silence passed between them for several moments, both seemingly happy to enjoy each other’s company. It was not often where they were not arguing, thanks to Yennefer and her readiness to be defensive, so Tissaia was relieved to have this beautiful moment together. 

A fleeting moment however as Tissaia soon found out.

“I met someone,” Yennefer nearly whispered. 

Tissaia felt herself become frozen in an instant. Her heart seeming to still, her eyes already stinging, hands clenching, nails digging into her palm to distract her from the pain of Yennefer’s words. When Tissaia said nothing, Yennefer continued.

“A witcher. Geralt of Rivia. We seem … drawn to each other. I don’t know how. Across the vast Continent we seem to continuously run into each other. The first time we met we were … dealing with a djinn,” Tissaia knew that was not the full story but did not interrupt Yennefer, she did not think her vocal chords would allow her even if she wanted to. “Anyway, afterwards we just, well, you know,” Tissaia desperately wished that she did not, in fact, know. “It was intense and surprisingly wonderful. We’ve happened across each other several times now and it always leads to the same thing. But he doesn’t …,” Yennefer trailed off, sounding a bit sad and confused.

“He doesn’t what, Yennefer?” Tissaia managed to keep her tone even though still refusing to look at the girl. Tissaia was suddenly very interested in keeping the wrinkle lines off of her gloves.

“The first time, he didn’t stay. I woke up and he was gone. The second time too. Now we seem to just be trading off with who leaves first. It’s frustrating,” the raven haired sorceress huffed in annoyance and stood up, pacing about the room and relighting the candles that had gone out from the wind when Tissaia had portaled in.

Tissaia clenched her teeth, torn between fuming with anger or breaking down in tears. She had not come to hear this. She had come to warn Yennefer that she was acting irresponsibly and that she needed to be careful. This new information was more than Tissaia could take. 

_And what a foolish man, leaving the beautiful Yennefer alone. I would never. I would have stayed until she forced me out._

Tissaia nearly snarled aloud but reigned herself in. She could get angry later, but for now she had to keep calm. 

“Then he’s a fool Yennefer. An utter fool. You have seen just how many men are willing to throw themselves down at your feet. You know how wanted and desired you are. And yet it’s the one man who doesn’t treat you as such that you’re running after? I thought you better than that,” Tissaia cursed herself. That had been much harsher than she had meant it to be. For the first time since they had met all those years ago, it was Tissaia who was pushing the other away. She could not bear to listen to Yennefer talk about some man who did not treasure her as she did. 

“What is your problem?” Yennefer asked incredulously.

“My problem,” Tissaia stood now, too angry to be sat near the mage. “Is that you have been given everything,” Yennefer stood at this. “I have given you all that I could give and yet you want more. When will you satisfied Yennefer, mhm? What more could you possibly want?” Tissaia spat angrily though tears threatened to fall. Yennefer did not seem to notice, or at least did not seem to care.

“Everything.”

Silence passed between the two. Yennefer went back to looking bored, able to hide any hurt that she might be feeling, though Tissaia was not sure that the younger mage could even feel that anymore. Tissaia managed to hold back her tears but knew they were close to falling. 

Tissaia tried to come up with something, anything to say to pull this interaction back. It had gone so off course that now her warning might be forgotten. 

Before Tissaia could find the words, Yennefer walked right past her, dismissing her.

“You may go, Rectoress. I have business to attend to,” Yennefer commanded, sitting down in her chair to continue trying out different jewelry.

Tissaia stood there a moment, desperately wishing for the right words to come but she knew it was over. She had tried her best and yet it had gone as it always seemed to be with them. Badly. 

The rectoress pressed her lips together, swallowing thickly to stop herself from crying just yet. She took a breath and closed her eyes, using what little energy she could feel left inside her to create a portal. 

She did not look back, for she knew that she would not see what she wanted. She would not see Yennefer looking at her sweetly, with that same smile she had had that night with the eels. An image that Tissaia had imprinted into her brain. No, she knew she would not see that so she walked into the portal, not knowing when she would see her piglet again.

**Author's Note:**

> ~ find me on tumblr at cheshire-observer ~


End file.
